Don't let those misogynists keep you home against your will!
I mentioned this to B, telling him how my mom loved staying home to raise us and how I think I might want to try it, at least for a year.
Another couple we know had kids and the wife left teaching for 10 years and then returned, so I figure it is possible to do.
B's response was a flat, "No, we won't be able to afford it. Both my parents worked, you'll be fine."
A:The philosophical differences in this relationship don't bother me very much. What bothers me is how B deals. He can't just say no and expect you to follow his lead. That's not going to work.
You need to be with someone who will talk this stuff out instead of shutting you down. Sometimes it's cheaper to stay home with a kid, right? Is his objection to stay-at-home parenting just about the money -- or does he need to be with someone who prioritizes work as much as he does?
I know it's difficult, but you have to forget about G for the moment. You live with your boyfriend, and G is just a distraction. Spend your energy asking B whether he really sees the two of you working as a couple in the future. You both want a certain kind of life and there's no "dealing with it when the time comes." This is why we date -- to figure out how a long-term relationship with someone might work.
And for the record, choosing a partner isn't just about picking a specific person. It is about choosing a life. If you and B simply want different things, it's OK to walk away.
Readers? Is G a factor in this decision? What do we think of B’s negotiating skills? Is there a future here? Discuss.