But if you want to keep a relationship alive - WHICH SHOULD BE YOUR KEY CONCERN HERE - you will learn where to pick your battles. And you will learn (if that's even possible) that men are not women, and cleanliness is at the bottom of most of our lists.
Make a list of what you want ladies. Clean men are not masculine, dominant alphas that kill things to eat and dominate at work. And that is what you want. So STFU.
No, I'm not a jerk. I'm sorry its this way. But IT. IS. THIS. WAY. Women have been complaining about messy men for 7 million years. YOU ARE NOT ALONE, but quit whining. A whiney woman is the #1 reason men avoid women ENTIRELY. Forget marriage. More and more men don't even SPEAK to women. That's how bad things have gotten.
Actually, THIS is how bad things have gotten:
According to Dr. Michele Ramsey, Associate Professor of Communication Arts and Sciences at Penn State Berks, emotional labor is often conflated with problem solving. “The gendered assumption is that ‘men are the problem solvers because women are too emotional,’" she explains. "But who is really solving the bulk of the world's problems at home and in the office?” As the household manager for my husband and three kids, I’m fairly certain I know the answer. I was gifted a necklace for Mother's Day while my husband stole away to deep clean the bathrooms, leaving me to care for our children as the rest of the house fell into total disarray.
In his mind, he was doing the thing I had most wanted—giving me sparkling bathrooms without having to do it myself. Which is why he was frustrated when I ungratefully passed by, not looking at his handiwork as I put away his shoes, shirt and socks that had been left on the floor. I stumbled over the box of gift wrap he had pulled off a high shelf two days earlier and left in the center of our closet. In order to put it back, I had to get a kitchen chair and drag it into our closet so I could reach the shelf where it belonged.
“All you have to do is ask me to put it back,” he said, watching me struggle.It was obvious that the box was in the way, that it needed to be put back. It would have been easy for him to just reach up and put it away, but instead he had stepped around it, willfully ignoring it for two days. It was up to me to tell him that he should put away something he got out in the first place.“That’s the point,” I said, now in tears, “I don’t want to have to ask.”The crying, the snapping at him—it all required damage control. I had to tell him how much I appreciated the bathroom cleaning, but perhaps he could do it another time (like when our kids were in bed). Then I tried to gingerly explain the concept of emotional labor: that I was the manager of the household, and that being manager was a lot of thankless work. Delegating work to other people, i.e. telling him to do something he should instinctively know to do, is exhausting. I tried to tell him that I noticed the box at least 20 times over the past two days. He had noticed it only when I was heaving it onto the top shelf instead of asking for help. The whole explanation took a lot of restraint.